Aathmika's  Pov

As we moved to our chamber my heart rate escalates.

I know I have to tell him.

If I want to start a fresh I need to .

Just when we entered the chamber I held his hand .

He turned to look at me.

That's it 

His green eyes

They gave me the confidence I wanted, the assurance I wanted 

I am going to tell him 

But what if he disgust me after knowing? , what if he shouts at me?, A lost  of what if's were going in my mind just then I was pulled by my thoughts by him shaking me 

"Aathmika.. where were you lost.. I have called you three times but you just stared at .. practically nothing.. what happened tell me.. is there anything that's bothring you? you just need to say and I'll-"

Ahil was cut off my Aathmika

"I want to tell you something .. about me.. something which is dark.. too dark for my own liking"

"okay I am listening, just don't panic, tell me what's wrong?"

Ahil said 

"हमने कल सब सुना सब कुछ ओर इसे हमे यह आभास हुआ कि आपको हमारे बारे मे यह बात पता होनी चाइये हम नही जानते आपकी इस बात मे क्या प्रतिक्रिया होगी किंतु अब हम ओर नही रुक सकते हम जानते है कि आप हमसे प्रेम करते है ओर हम आपके प्रेम का सम्मान भी करते है अहिल किंतु आप अपना दृष्टिकोण हमारी यह बात सुनके बताईयेगा कि क्या आप अभी भी हमसे प्रेम करते है या नही|"

जब हमे पता चला कि हमारे माता पिता हमारे विवाह का प्रस्ताव आपको भेज रहे है हमने अभिज्ञान को पात्र लिखा था ये सोचकर कि वे हमसे विवाह करेंगे पीआर नादान थे हम जो हमने सोचा कि वे हमसे प्रेम करते है आपको पता है उन्ने क्या कहा उहोने कहा कि हम उन्हे वो नही दे पाए जो वे चाहते थे और वे चाहते थे शारीरिक संबंध उन्होने हमे एहसास दिलाया कि हम प्रेम के लायक नही है दिल पर बोहोत बड़ा घाव दिया है उन्होने हमारे ।

 हम आपकी भावनाएं समझते है अहिल किंतु किंतु हम अभी इतने सक्षम नही है कि हम वापिस प्रेम कर सके हम जानते है कि आप हमारे पति है आपका हक है हमपर किंतु हमे नही समझ आराहा हम क्या करे । इतना स्पष्ट है कि हम अभिज्ञान से प्रेम नही करते उनके लिए हमारे दिल मे सिर्फ नफरत बची है अहिलोर ये भी स्पष्ट है कि हम आपसे प्रेम करेंगे हम पूरी कोशिश करेंगे अहिल पूरी कोशिश करेंगे इस रिश्ते को प्रेम और स्नेह से सींचने की हमने जब कल आपको सब कुछ कहते हुए सुना तो हम अपने आपको रोक नही पाए सब कुछ बताना चाहते है हम आपको|

  सब कुछ देना चाहते है हम आपको अहिल आप इस प्रेम इस स्नेह के बोहोत लायक है अहिल अभि के लिए हम सिर्फ इतना कह सकते है कि पसंद आग्ये है आप हमे , भरोसा करते है आप पीआर , ओर बोहोत सम्मान है आपके लिए हमारे हृदय मे , क्या अभी आप इसे काम चला सकते है?"

(I heard everything yesterday and it gave me the impression that you should know this thing about me, I do not know what will be your reaction to this but now I can not stop anymore, I know that you love me and I also respect your love, Ahil, but you will tell your point of view by listening to me whether you still love me  or not?

When I came to know that my parents were sending  you a proposal for my marriage, I wrote a letter to Abhigyan thinking that he would marry me, but I was naïve, I was naïve who I thought he loved me, you know what he said, he said that I could not give him what he wanted and he wanted physical relations. he have inflicted a big wound on my heart.

I understand your feelings Ahil but I am not yet capable enough to love back, I know that you are my husband, you have the right over me but I do not understand what to do. It is so clear that I do not love Abhigyan, only hatred is left in my hearts for him, Ahil and it is also clear that I will love you, I will try my best, Ahil I will try my best to nurture this relationship with love and affection. When I heard you say everything yesterday, I could not stop myself, I want to tell you everything.

I want to give everything to you Ahil, you deserve this love very much, for now Ahil , I can only say that I have started liking you, trust you , and I have a lot of respect for you in my heart, can it work it now?)

by the end of my words I was drowned in tears , when I moved my head to locate him, I saw his mouth slightly open and little tears in the corner of his eyes, totally overwhelm by what I said < He smiled widely and hugged me while putting his head in the crook of my neck . I hugged him back smiling through the tears. just when I was about to pull away he tightened the hug and i felt wetness in my neck .

He was crying 

"अहिल यह सब हमने आपको रुलाने के लिए नही बोला था ना पसंद आने लगे है आप हमे ओर आपकी आंखो यू आंसो अब हमे बोहोत दर्द दे रहे है|"

(Ahil, I did not say all this to make you cry, I have  started liking you , and the tears in your eyes now  are giving me a lot of pain)

I said 

"हमने इंतजार किया आत्मिका, बोहोत इंतजार किया आपका, बीएस कभी हिम्मत नही जुटा पाए , काश , काश हम हिम्मत जुटा लेते ओर सबसे पहले आपको बता देते तो आज ये सब न होता , आपको इतना सब नही सहना पड़ता , आत्मिका , दिल दुख रहा है हमारा यह सोच सोचकर कि कैसे, कैसे आपने इतना सब झेल लिया ओर एक आह तक नही आने दी अपने मुख से, आत्मिका, हमारा वादा है आपसे , आपको इतना प्रेम देंगे कि आप भूल जाएंगी कि कोई हैवन भी था जिसने आपके प्रेम का मज़ाक बनाया|"

"हमे महादेव की सौगंध है आत्मिका हमने अभिज्ञान के खून से अमरगढ़ नही रंग दिया तो हम आईएस महरगढ़ के आने वाले राजा नही"

(I waited for you Aathmika, waited for you a lot, but could never muster courage, I wish, I wish I had gathered courage and told you first of all, then all this would not have happened today, you do not have to bear all this, Aathmika, my heart is hurting thinking how, how, how you have suffered all so much and did not let even a sigh come from your mouth, Aathmika, I promise you, I will love you so much that you will forget that there was a monster who made fun of your love.

I give promise to  Mahadev, Aathmika, if we did not paint Amargarh with the blood of Abhigyan, then I am not the coming king of Mahargarh.)

I shivered at his last sentence and I moved back, I was still in his hold, in the cage of his arms, our faces was close as I moved back from the hug, him still having me close, his hand on my waist and mine on his shoulder , if one of moved our lips will touch each other , conquering the thirst of years , his eyes looked at my lips flickering with a different emotion, more than love, something he was craving for, something I couldn't decipher but want to get drown in it.  He is something.

Those green eyes , like an emerald sea were pulling me close to him , forcing me to give in the temptation, his luscious brown locks falling on his face , the messy look he is bearing right now is wholesome, He didn't bear long hair , but long enough that the hair locks falls on his face , The urge to caress and pull them when his full lips devour mine, was too much, just too much,  He pulled his hand to my cheeks to caress them slowly, softly, making my urge grow more, and breathing fast. His hand then caressed my jawline to my lower lip, I shivered when his hand touch my lower lip, caressing it slowly, softly, like its some petal, the feeling of his rough fingers on my lips is like softness binding with roughness making it look like passion with love .

" आत्मिका, आप हर तरह से लायक है, प्रेम के, स्नेह के, ओर मोह के , हम आपसे बोहोत प्रेम करते है आत्मिका, हाँ अगर आपके राजा अभिज्ञान से शारीरिक संबंध होते तो हमे थोड़ा दुख होता ,जलन भी होती, किंतु हम कभी आपको गलत नही ठहराते क्यूकी वह आपकी मरजी आपके मत से होता। पर अब जब आपने हमे ये सब बताया है, तो हम एक चीज करना चाहते है, हमने अपने आपको रोक रखा है आत्मिका, अगर अभी स्तिथि कुच ऐसी नही होती तो हम आपको बताते कि हम आपके लिये क्या महसूस करते ओर ये बात हम आपसे सिर्फ प्रेम वाश होके नही बोल रहे, बाल्की आपके मोह वाश मे बोल रहे है|"

"you don't know Aathmika how you make my body function when you are this near to me our breaths mingling with your hands on my shoulder and mine on your waist which feels as soft like resham , you just don't know how much I want to make you mine at this instant, and this is all clear in your eyes that you want it too but still I want to ask you beforehand, can I kiss my wife, my queen  and mark her for an eternity?"

(Aathmika, you are worthy in every way, of love, affection, and attachment, I love you very much, Aathmika, yes, if you had physical relations with King Abhigyan, then I would have been a little sad, jealous, but I would never have faulted you because it would have been your wish, according to your opinion. But now that you have told me all this, I want to do one thing, I have stopped myself, Aathmika, if the situation was not like this now, then I would have told you what I would  feel for you and I am not saying this thing to you just out of love, but because of the attraction I am feeling towards you.)

his breath was falling on my cheeks followed by a gasp that left my mouth when he squeezed my waist  by the end of his sentence, I was breathless, I nodded my head looking into his eyes, my lips parted.

"I would like this affirmation of your in words , my queen"

he said , again taking my breaths away and I gasp due to the proximity and closeness, the distance was dangerously, it all felt right yet too risky, too risky to think that if we kiss , we might not just kiss, the temptation the hunger in his eyes justifies that , my knees were weak by now, so weak that if he wouldn't have held me I might had a fall.

I was about to say yes staring at his lips

"fuck it"

he said and slammed his lips on mine, at first just sucking softly, enjoying it, sensing my Lips's each nook and corner , tasting the very point of my lips , his tongue came into the show and starts licking my lower lip until I want them open because of the endearing and un- handleable sensations, and his tongue plays his part in the kiss, tasting every corner of my mouth that even I wouldn't even be aware of .

 His kiss is like fire and water both, its as hard to set my nerves on fire, and as languid as flowy as a sea or an ocean to calm the fire set, right know he is kissing me like he want to pour all his hunger love passion everything in just that rough and hard kiss, but he is also kissing me like He is dependent on the kiss to live, like if he'll pull away he'll die, as he need this kiss to stay sane.

I reciprocated the kiss with the same love, hunger and raw passion, the passion , the raw passion this kiss has is something I can never forget. meanwhile the kiss going on his hands were doing its little adventure on my body. 

His right hand moved to my nape to angle my lips to kiss it better, and his other hand moved from my waist to my back caressing the almost naked back as it was tied by  just one dori ,  his hand tugs lightly on the dori and I gasp  and his mouth turned more violent tugging my lips with his teeth, and then sucking it to ease the pain and again goes on kissing them as its the oxygen he need.

His hand from the back moves back to my waist caressing it softly while kissing.

and now I tap on his shoulder not having enough air in my lungs .

He understood and reluctantly broke the kiss. both of us breathing heavily resting his forehead on mine, he stared at my after-kiss-flushed face, and I had down casted my eyes ,  not having enough in me to look at his eyes just after the stunt I pulled , after catching our breaths, it was now a peaceful silence in the room, and us in the same position, he put his finger on my chin and made me look at him.

Looking at his green eyes this time, made by cheeks red , like a tomato.

"Aathmika if you'll blush like this then I wouldn't be able to control my self"

I pushed him lightly and turned away putting my hand on my face covering the blush .

I am shy, so so shy.

He backhugged me putting his chin on  my shoulder.

"आत्मिका अभी आपका यह हाल है तो सोचिये जेबी आप हम एक होंगे, हर प्रकार से, तब आपका क्या हाल होगा|"

(Aathmika, if this is your condition now, then think that when we will be one, in every way, then what will happen to you.)

my blush deepened and I turned to hide my face in his chest not wanting to face him at this time.

"हम आपको ऐसे ही अपनी बाहों मे संजो के रखना चाहते है आत्मिका ज़िंदगी भर के लिए जब तक हमारे स्वास चलेंगी इस दिल पर केवल एक ही नाम होगा आत्मिका"

(I want to keep you in my arms like this, Aathmika, for a lifetime, as long as my breath lasts, there will be only one name on this heart, Aathmika)

he said and I hugged him more tightly.

"I love you Aathmika I really do "

I break the hug to look into his eyes

"हम भी आपको बोहोत पसंद करते है अहिल, अब इस पसंद को प्रेम मे कैसे बदलना है इतना तो आप जानते ही है|

हम आपसे प्रेम करना चाहते है अहिल बोहोत प्रेम|"

(I also like you very much, now you know how to convert this like into love.

I want to love you Ahil very much love)

I smiled while saying this and his smile and love in his eyes doubled hearing his . he again hugged me . tightly enough to knock my breath. and also to make my breast ache and nipples erect. I just hope he don't feel this.

sensing the comfortness in the hug I prayed to mahadev.

mahadev hamare rishte ki raksha karna, aapke  hi kripa se hame ek aisa rishta mila hai jise ham umar bhar sanjona chahenge  . raksha karna